Grieving your loved one on the Fourth of July

Independence Day, commonly know as the Fourth of July, is right around the corner. Communities celebrate with fireworks, parades, concerts, carnivals and fairs. Families celebrate with picnics, barbeques, and baseball games. Politicians look for a format for speeches and ceremonies. And there are many other public and privates events celebrating the history, government and traditions of the United Sates.

But what if your loved one isn’t around this year? What if your deceased husband was the one to raise the flag in front of your home? Or if you deceased loved one died in Iraq or Afghanistan? You may n0t feel much like celebrating.

Birthdays, holidays, and anniversaries can often trigger our grief reactions. Consider these tips for helping you cope this holiday weekend.

• Create a photo collage. Sort through old holiday photos to create a collage that highlight these memories.
• Light a candle that you have specially selected to represent your loved one. The lighting of this candle will provide a symbol of their presence.
• Have your loved one’s favorite meal for your holiday picnic or barbeque.
• Have a toast in their memory and then allow each person to share a memory about what made this person so special.
• Sing or listen to their favorite patriotic song.
• Donate to a favorite charity. The selfless act of giving to others might be just the thing you need.
• Write a letter to your loved one. Share how you feel, how it’s different and how it’s the same.

You will very likely have other ideas that you can incorporate into your weekend plans. Remember, you are not alone. Take care of yourself and reach out for help as needed.