The earthquake in Haiti is a public tragedy. With considerable media coverage, it seems as if it happened or could have happened in our own backyard. It is the focus of national attention and mourning. For many Haitians life will never be the same. For some, life does not change and they will resume their lives as the tragedy recedes. For those immediately affected, they must cope with their losses and grief. Their world view may have changed. They may have increased fear and anxiety. They may experience a spiritual crisis. And political turmoil and unrest may be thrown into the mix.
Yet others will attempt to reconstruct a sense of order and rebuild. Some will be very resilient and experience considerable growth. They will go on with a renewed sense of purpose and meaning in their lives and their relationships.
Some of use may find ourselves glued to the TV staring in disbelief at the devastaion. Some of us may use distraction as a way to cope. We need to use the lessons learned from 911 and Katrina. Let us open our hearts and if we can , our pocketbooks to Haiti. It is something concrete we can do. We can send send prayers, money and love, but we should not take on their suffering. It will not help the people of Haiti heal.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Monday, January 11, 2010
2010 - a new year
Winter days in Ohio can feel dark, very cold and gloomy. This can take a toll on our general outlook. For those of us who are grieving, these feelings can be overwhelming.
We may think to ourselves, “I’m not sure where to begin. It seems like nothing will ever get better.” Helping ourselves when we feel overloaded can become a huge task. Here are some ideas that may help you as you work your way through grief.
CARING---Allow yourself to accept expressions of caring from others even though they might be uneasy and awkward. Support groups may be beneficial to you.
GOALS----For a while, it may seem that much of life is without meaning. At times like these, there are two seemingly contradictory rules of thumb: "live one day at a time," and "small goals can help." If you try to plan something to look forward to -- like a movie, going to lunch with a friend or a small trip next month -- it helps you get through the immediate future.
HOPE----You may find comfort and hope from those who have experienced a similar loss. They can describe some things that have helped them. The realization that they have recovered and that time does help, can give you hope that sometime in the future your grief will be less raw and painful.
RELAXATION---REST---EXERCISE----Take care of yourself. You may need extra amounts of things you needed before. Afternoon naps, hot baths, a trip, a “cause” to work for to help others may give you a lift.
SECURITY----Try to reduce or find help for stresses in your life. Allow yourself to be close to those you trust. Getting back into a routine helps. Remember to do things at your own pace.
SMALL PLEASURES----Do not underestimate the healing effects of small pleasures. A walk, reading a book or magazine, preparing a favorite food all are small steps toward regaining your pleasure in life itself.
TIME----Take time to be alone. And, take time to be with others whom you trust and who will listen when you need to talk. Allow time for the feelings that accompany grief and time to understand those feelings.
Remember that we are here with comfort, hope and healing.
We may think to ourselves, “I’m not sure where to begin. It seems like nothing will ever get better.” Helping ourselves when we feel overloaded can become a huge task. Here are some ideas that may help you as you work your way through grief.
CARING---Allow yourself to accept expressions of caring from others even though they might be uneasy and awkward. Support groups may be beneficial to you.
GOALS----For a while, it may seem that much of life is without meaning. At times like these, there are two seemingly contradictory rules of thumb: "live one day at a time," and "small goals can help." If you try to plan something to look forward to -- like a movie, going to lunch with a friend or a small trip next month -- it helps you get through the immediate future.
HOPE----You may find comfort and hope from those who have experienced a similar loss. They can describe some things that have helped them. The realization that they have recovered and that time does help, can give you hope that sometime in the future your grief will be less raw and painful.
RELAXATION---REST---EXERCISE----Take care of yourself. You may need extra amounts of things you needed before. Afternoon naps, hot baths, a trip, a “cause” to work for to help others may give you a lift.
SECURITY----Try to reduce or find help for stresses in your life. Allow yourself to be close to those you trust. Getting back into a routine helps. Remember to do things at your own pace.
SMALL PLEASURES----Do not underestimate the healing effects of small pleasures. A walk, reading a book or magazine, preparing a favorite food all are small steps toward regaining your pleasure in life itself.
TIME----Take time to be alone. And, take time to be with others whom you trust and who will listen when you need to talk. Allow time for the feelings that accompany grief and time to understand those feelings.
Remember that we are here with comfort, hope and healing.
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